Make Courtesy Your Way Of Life!

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Make Courtesy Your Way of Life

Showing of Politeness in one’s Attitude and Behavior towards others is known as Courtesy. Respect towards others should be standard behavior in the workplace, regardless of role, rank, or reputation and Courtesy plays and important role in it.

Politeness costs nothing.

Do manners matter at work?

Do I need to be polite all the time?

I am in the middle of an important meeting and my boss calls. Do I take the call or just call my boss after the meeting?

I do not have the answers to these questions my friend, you do.

I can simply show you the way. You have to walk the path on your own. And you can do this by improving your value system. Here is the quickest way to improve your value system.

Quick Test to Improve Your Value System

According to “Mahatma Gandhi” each of the above behavioral traits reflects lack of values.  Therefore, to check the value system two tests were introduced – “mama test” and the “baba test”.

  1. The Mama test- whatever you are doing whether at home or at work, whether alone or with someone-if a question is about your values ask yourself, if my mama were to see me doing this would she be proud of me or would she hang her head in shame? Your values would then be clarified rather quickly. If you passed the mama test and failed all other tests, you have passed. If you failed the Mama test and passed all other tests you have failed.
  2. The Baba test– If the mama test doesn’t do it, I have another test called the “Baba test”. Whatever you are doing whether at home or at work, whether alone or with someone-if a question is about your values-ask yourself,” if my children were to see me doing what I am doing, would I want them to see it or would I be embarrassed? Again the confusion will get cleared quickly and you will get your answers.

The basic premise is- “If you won’t do it at home, then why do it at workplace?”

Incivility and disrespect are not virtues and must certainly not be a part of your value system.

In order to create a healthy workplace and a better “YOU”, you must get rid of bad habits, within or outside of your workplace.

There are two basic promises that you need to keep at your workplace:

  1. You must encourage good behaviour.
  2. You must discourage bad behaviour.

How to Encourage Good Behaviour

Before I tell you how to encourage good conduct, I urge you to think on your own.

Learning Activity

How would you encourage good conduct at workplace?

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Bad conduct, like an iceberg, is deep rooted. It comes from bad experiences in the past and it also stems from fear. People get blinded by negative emotions and do things that they should not do.

We must begin by setting every employee’s expectations right.

Every detail of expected behaviours must be chalked out and shared with each team member.

If you want to bring in a culture of etiquette, you must begin with yourself. Demonstrate good behaviour at all times, without any exceptions. One slip up can lead to the fall of the entire sequence of dominos.

Appreciate good conduct and reward those who display exceptionally good behaviour.

You can make good conduct an integral part of your appraisal process.

Encouraging appropriate behaviour is much simpler than discouraging bad behaviour. All a person requires is a pat on the back and a smile from you!

Discouraging Bad Behaviour

Stamping bad conduct out can be taxing. It requires assertiveness and determination to discourage bad conduct.

Learning Activity

How would you discourage bad conduct at workplace?

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First off, we need to be sympathetic and empathetic towards the perpetrators. We must try to understand the reason behind their conduct.

Secondly, open and clear communication is the key to handle incivility at workplace. It is important to let the perpetrator know, in clear terms, that his or her actions are impacting performances and creating a negative atmosphere at workplace.

Aman was a very quiet person and one of his colleagues used to joke about him being quiet. Then gradually the jokes became too much, but nobody dared tell him to put a stop to his behaviour. Suddenly, as expected, there was a harassment complaint against this gentleman and he was politely asked to resign.

So you see, had people communicated clearly, Aman wouldn’t have felt so bad and this gentleman would not have lost his job.

Think before you speak and respect before you think. Respecting others must be a part of your being. If it is not, you are more likely to act discourteously.

Since every person is responsible for his or her own actions, it is important that you think about the feelings of every individual working for or with you.

Creating an Ideal Workplace

A healthy workplace where people collaborate to win is the ideal workplace. Now my question to you is; is my expectation unreal?

The answer- Of course not!

We are all smart human beings with the ability to learn. The good news is that good behaviour can be learnt and demonstrated!

Let us see the few things that we can work around to make it a better place.

Seek constant feedback from the staff members to know the conduct of each employee. Since everyone is giving their feedback, one person does not feel cornered.

Good behaviour must be distinguished from bad behaviour. What may seem appropriate to one, may not be proper for another. For example, for a mother to scold her daughter is fine, but a boss to scold the subordinate is not!

Discipline rules and regulations must be same for all without any exceptions.

There must be a system to handle and resolve conflicts. Otherwise things may get way out of hand.

Say sorry and mean it! Apologizing and realising one’s mistake it always a great thing to do.

Ask yourself how you would feel if you were in a similar situation.

Civility at workplace is fundamental to the success of any organisation. So encourage civility and discourage inappropriate behaviour.

Creating an Action Plan

There is no learning without an action. Therefore, I am going to present to you certain scenarios and you must seek your own application out of this book.

Shouting at a colleague in front of all the employees in the Head Office

  1. Will you behave like this at a friend’s house?
  2. What excuses would you give to justify your conduct?

Impolite conduct at workplace

Make a list of things done by you that have been inappropriate.

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Think about the most recent interaction where you ended by in a conflict.

Make sure you find ways to resolve the conflict and communicate clearly and crisply with the others.

It is always better to nip the problem in the bud and learn from every experience we have with people. I shall bid you adieu with the hope that the information provided in this book will be of use to you and you will participate actively in this endeavour to create a better tomorrow.

Courtesy, Etiquette and Soft Skills Trainings

Courtesy, Etiquetteand Soft Skills trainings go a long way in shaping and influencing your behaviour leading to your progress and growth in your career. How you think, feel and behave at home and at work or in a society determines how you are looked at by others. Courtesy, Etiquette and Soft Skills Trainers are resources who help you build these basic blocks of success.
To keep yourself motivated like our Facebook Page Daily Motivation by Dr. Vivek Bindra and subscribe to our YouTube Channel for more Inspirational videos.

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